I decided to make this Saturday about movies. After a 60 minute Yogaglo class and a quick shower, I headed west to the Laemmle Santa Monica on foot as it is deliciously cool and overcast. I've recently embarked on a personal sugar experimentation program so my plan was to stop at Jamba Juice and sneak a smoothie into the theatre. Two things happened to prevent this from happening:
- I left my house at 10:20am and the movie started at 11:00am. Clearly, I underestimated the time it would take for me to walk 2.4 miles and made it with literally no time to spare.
- I thought there was a Jamba Juice on Wilshire, but as I got closer (and the time got later) I realized it was actually on Santa Monica Blvd. and I was already out of time.
I knew I had to eat something because I was starving but didn't want popcorn. I know that I'm being sugar friendly these days, but I don't want candy candy because that's really pushing it. Just before I walk into the theatre, sweaty from the unplanned speed walking, I think maybe they will have something healthyish since this is Santa Monica and also an independent theatre. I was right!
I had an Alternative Baking Company vegan snicker doodle cookie and absolutely LOVED Pressure Cooker, which follows a group of high school students in Philadelphia who went through a culinary program that gave them the opportunity to compete for college scholarships. It was inspiring and touching and made me grateful for all the opportunities that life and a solid community provide. It is a must-see!
A frame of the movie, obvi.
The Santa Monica farmers' market was also happening. Love how much support our farmers' markets have.
For those of you who know me, this cookie breakfast is sort of a revelation. I've suffered from eating disorders off and on since I was six. I've learned through many years of therapy and 12 step groups and inner seeking that it was NEVER about the food. I used the food to control my body and my actions. I used it to dull emotions. I used it as an excuse to not show up for my life. I used it as a tool to hate myself and self-destruct and one of my favorite ways of doing this was with sugary foods (or sugar-free sugary foods pumped full of chemicals).
As I've been in "recovery", I completely stopped eating sugar, thinking if I ate something sweet I would go back to the hell that is a full blown eating disorder. What I am discovering today is as long as I'm not eating to stuff a feeling or make myself sick or isolate, it kind of doesn't matter what I'm eating. Because I don't want to feel sick and feel horrible and panicked, I'm going to choose not to eat a quart of ice cream or an entire cake. I will, however enjoy an ice cream cone with my husband while we walk on the Venice boardwalk, or have a vegan cookie at the movies because I'm hungry and it tastes good and has good stuff in it! What a concept.
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